Below you will find a list of people I am forever grateful towards. Many I will most likely never meet, but from the bottom of my heart, people listed below, I thank you.
1. The people who make toy reviews on Youtube. Thank you. I am not sure what motivated you to review children’s toys and show the youtube world how they work, but whatever your motivation, it has truly made my life a lot easier. You have helped me while I tried to feed Nola and Flynn was having a freak out. You saved me when I ran out of jelly beans and I am in the midst of bribing my kid to pee on the potty. You allowed me to get work done on time. Regularly. Thank you, youtube toy reviews. You are a true hero.
2. Ylvis. Thank you, Ylivs. I did not know who you were a few short months ago, but you have become a regular source of entertainment in this household. Hell, I would even say you are educational. Thanks to you my kid will tell you that a frog says croak. I mean forget rippit rippit. You also have allowed Flynn the opportunity to become obsessed with his first song, memorize his first lyrics and develop the some dancing routines that give Abby Lee Miller a run for her money.
3. Anna Dewdney. Anna shares a birthday with Jesus Christ and that is no coincidence. Dewdney, as my niece so loving calls her, is the author of Llama Llama serious. Llama Llama misses Mama. Llama Llama mad at Mama. Llama Llama Red Pajama. You get it. See these books have become a reference for many things in my life these days. When I want to leave Flynn at the Nac daycare we discuss Llama Llama crying for Mama in the book. When Flynn had a meltdown in Target aisle 3 over some damn Cheddar Bunnies, we discussed Llama Llama mad at Mama. And every night when I leave Flynn in his bed I tell him I am going to do the dishes just like Mama in Llama Llama Red Pajama. So Anna Dewdney thank you. I love how a kid llama is the basis for all areas of my life these days.
4. Whatever Scotto child we stole the plasmacar from. Thank you. I will return your plasmacar shortly. However, in the meantime this bad boy has provided hours of entertainment to Flynn. Every morning he tells me he is taking “his plasmacar” to work. Somedays he is going to Lockheed. Other mornings he is a basketball coach. Most mornings he is Dr. Schinn. All mornings he takes out my ankles. In the future Scotto children, if you don’t want me to steal your item – add some flair to it. See when Flynn was freaking out about “his plasmacar” in your garage that fateful day, I showed him how loved the other cars were – with their added flash lights and comfy pillows. However, this poor car had no special decal. No love. No mark. Therefore Flynn felt the need to claim that one and hold it hostage.
5. Instagram. There I said it. Without you I would be so lonely. So trapped. So bored. You entertain me through many feedings, many meltdowns and many hours waiting for Flynn to finish using the bathroom. Without you I would be trapped and alon in the world of naps. So many damn naps. Don’t get me wrong I love the “lightened load” during nap time, but with Nola still taking 3 a day and Flynn loving his midday snooze, I feel trapped. How do I explore the various children’s playspaces when one of these fools is always napping or about to nap or needs to nap. Instagram, thank you, for making me a complete addict, a junkie. You are my lifeline. Instagram you and I will stay friends…until it is warm out and I say screw the damn naps kids, Mom’s going to
sit by chase you around this pool and tan.