I know everyone is dying for updates

Want some updates on how things are running around here? no, okay well then click here and go enjoy yourself something actually interesting.

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Those of you just dying to know what is happening in the Boone Show read on.

  1. Quince is weaned. I mean he still might occasionally walk over flapping his hand at me signing for milk, but he accepts that they do not work (for him) and moves along. Well by move along I mean he says paci belly on repeat and then pulls up my shirt and rubs his head on my flabby stomach. It’s really cute worse than nursing him. Maybe next time I blog (in 6.5 months) he will be weaned from this weird habit. Or on that show strange addictions. Either way you’ll just have to sit tight to find out about that. Also, if anyone out there is googling weaning tandem fed toddler the answer is cold turkey – or at least that was our answer for a kid who nursed as much as his 5 month old sister. Oh and it wasn’t pretty.

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    She won’t give me milk anymore, but she

  2. I followed some sleep consultant blog and decided I was going to get my kids to sleep through the night (or at least better) starting from the bottom up. So Navi is up first. I haven’t done any sleep training techniques, but just trying to stick to a schedule. That lasted all the three days. Then my husband left town, we had birthday parties and I realized I have to leave the house. So I’ll do my best, but basically just resigned to that fact that no schedule/no sleep training method will work for us. So instead I just google how little sleep one can function on and keep track of kids night wakings in the notes on my phone. I figure those notes will be evidence when I go insane. Seriously, though, I can’t be consistent for 3 days let alone 3 weeks.

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    Do you plan on sleeping, Navi? Oh good because we don’t,

  3. I need a carseat for the third row of a Honda Pilot, preferably harness, but high back booster will do. Needs to be really short in length so the tiny bit of leg room that exists back there is not consumed by carseats hanging over. Or need a new car. Carseat seems cheaper option so lets start there.

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    No really, my legs are trapped, mother!

  4. I survived another long weekend alone with two very fun birthday parties for the kids. I will be honest I need to get a fit bit to monitor my blood pressure during these weekends because it seems whatever plan I have to make things run a tad smoother will go to crap – from D’s schedule changing last minute to a store being closed to packages not arriving. I have to be “on” 24/7 and I feel like I am still trying to recover days later.

 

 

5. When is Quantico coming back on? I mean I know I am the only one who watches this show, but really I miss it. Please come back, Quantico, please.

 

 

Adjusting …

IMG_3822For the first few weeks in our new home, I struggled to adjust to new routine/schedule. While Dominique often had late night practices or weekend games before the move, I was rarely home alone with both kids battling bedtime, as I lived with not only my two parents, but also my younger brother who while he worked massive hours, always seem to get off early on a day I was ready to go berserk.

In addition to the number of family members in the home, I also had a million and one options for daily entertainment for my kids. From indoor play spaces to our gym/pool/cafe/babysitting service mecca to my grandmom’s house and so much more. We had memberships at children museums, zoos and always found places to entertain ourselves when the weather wasn’t great. We were always out exploring new places.

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As I adjust to life up here – I am realizing there is no “replacement” for these things. I cannot find a new mom to come in and listen to me debrief my day at 6:30 every night (unless I can get adopted at the age of 31 up here). There is no Lulu’s (yet – please brother-in-law make this happen), no grandmom and actually not even Chick-fil-a playground near by. While there are so many beautiful and wonderful things – they often require being outside and embracing all sorts of weather ((or not open until the weekend). While I loved taking the kids to Tyler Park or over to Core Creek before the move, I loved doing that when it was 70 and sunny. We are learning to embrace all weather and be outside regardless of the sun or temperature.

Since my return from my Halloween visit home, I decided that I cannot replace. I cannot just find those things from home up here. I have to create new. I have to find a new normal. And so the first step was creating a new nightly routine. Sorry Nola, but your days of being a late night diva are over. You will have to practice your dance routines during the day, as the lack of nap and lack of a second adult come dinnertime, makes this lady really need a break!

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For the past week and half, I have thrown my kids in the bath every night between 5:45 and 6:30 depending on if/how they napped. To be honest – my kids never bathed this much in their life, but every night we shlep toys to the tub and start the routine. Since our house is one floor, I can run out and quickly clean-up toys and shut down the living area while still monitoring the fools in the tub. We then get on PJ’s, brush teeth and begin to read for a good 20 minutes. Nola started out not laying, but she has since listened to the stories – interjecting every 15 seconds with some question, comment or concern. I then start the whole rubbing Flynn’s back and getting him settled. Most nights, especially if his nap was short or did not exist, he will fad away relatively quick. It would probably be shorter, but he is more often than not serenaded by Nola’s late night monologue. Once Flynn is out, I try with all my might to calm the crazy one to sleep. She recently is potty trained so she often requests to pee one last time (and I let her since she actually wakes up dry most days). We then rock, sing, rub backs until she eventually fades. It can at times take another whole hour. Dear Lord thank god for instagram, audiobooks (when I remember headphones) and my ability to say to myself “if she isn’t asleep after I count to 100…” a couple of times before actually losing it.

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While this routine is far from perfect and can often take 2 (or more) hours – it has provided me with some relief at the end of the day. Some time to clean up the crazy mess or to sit and stare at a blank wall wondering what the hell we will do tomorrow, or in tonight’s case to write a long blog post while eating chocolate chip cookies and drinking milk waiting for the first wake-up of the night. (which according to my tracker will be around 10:45 this evening).

Sleep Tips from the Mom Whose Kids Never Slept Through the Night

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If you follow my instagram account (flynnandnola) you probably know that sleeping is not the Boone Babies strong suit. While I describe Flynn as a good sleeper, I realize (usually from a horrified look on someone’s face when I describe his sleeping patterns), that he really is no gem. I mean he’s almost 3 and has never slept through the night. Not once. Not even by accident. However, all in all Flynn naps well, goes to sleep pretty easy and usually sleeps a decent amount at night.

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Nola on the other hand is a hot mess. With Flynn I always could read his cues and get him to sleep and develop a pretty regular routine throughout his life. Nola girl has yet to keep a pattern of sleep longer than 2 weeks, loves to stay up late, hates napping, nurses all day and all night and really is just a mess. Most days I handle it with little to no cursing and lots of coffee. Sometimes at 3 AM, after searching for Flynn’s paci and throwing my boob back in Nola’s face, I google sleep deprived mother, my toddler hates sleep, dr. sears sleep problems, sleep amounts for toddler, how to survive on no sleep…you get the point.

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Originally, I was going to compile a list of things not to say to me such as “maybe it is the coffee”. But then I realized that some times I welcome the advice/suggestions and other times I want to take your Parenting Sleep Bible Book and shove it up your ass. I think my reaction probably depends on the number of hours of  uninterrupted I had the night before. So really instead of a list of things not to say to an exhausted mother, one thing you can say is “shit that sucks”. I’d say you could even say it will all work out, just hang in there, but depending on the number of minutes the parent received in sleep the night before, they may begin scream that if they don’t sleep they are going to lose it. So stick with shit that sucks, more coffee? That might work. Then again, it might not.

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However, if you are an over exhausted mom reading this at 3 AM searching not for a long term sleep solution or step by step guide, but something to help you survive this season of motherhood, here are some notes for you. Feel free to comment that I am a complete a-hole and that if you don’t get any sleep you will end up in a mental institution, as that is often a response I have when things get real tough.

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1. Acceptance. Seriously. I accept the things I cannot change and the wisdom to know the difference. Right now your child and you are partners in working out this sleep business. Maybe you aren’t ready to let them cry or maybe you never will be, maybe they don’t really care what Harvey says they aren’t the happiest baby on the block and won’t be for a number of years. Whatever the reason, accept that your kid isn’t going to sleep. Don’t expect to get anything done during “nap time”, don’t plan on making a fancy any dinner. Just accept that you and your kid will not be sleeping for a bit. Once you accept that, then you can plan accordingly.

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2. You’ve accepted it. Great. Plan for no sleep. So you know that tonight you are going to get no sleep. Prep for it. Brew the coffee. Stock magazines by your bed. Save your favorite blog reading for 2 AM. Get your netflix ready for a middle of the night show. Be ready to come downstairs at 3 AM, microwave old coffee and let your kid do their thing. Whatever it is – just plan for something that will make you a little less annoyed. If your kid is a no napper, prep for that. Prep quick meals you can eat. Locate the healthiest meal delivery service. God knows just find food. Practice reading the same book over and over again. Have boxes of games ready to play. Don’t plan to do anything. Seriously. It just makes you angry.

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3. I will preface this by saying I know I am awful. Just as bad, fine worse,  than the mom’s from Toddlers and Tiaras and Dance Moms. I know it. That being said Dress your kid in the morning and make them look real cute. I am serious here. Despite what you are about to think/write/think about me, I didn’t have a kids just to dress them up. I had kids to torture myself. Just kidding. I had kids because kids are awesome. But sometimes my awesome kids don’t sleep and make me angry. So when they look real damn cute, it is much harder to get angry. So throw a little bow in their yogurt filled hair and think this sucker may not know that kids their age are “suppose” to get 12 hours a sleep a day, but they sure do know how to look cute. {Reading that back makes me sound awful. Sorry, mom}

4. Stop reading how much sleep your kid needs. Seriously. So your kid slept 10 hours yesterday. And the guidelines say they need 14. Your kid is not going to die due to a season of bad sleep. And they will work it out. Now I mean if you think there is something unhealthy going on, talk to your doctor, but once you rule out that there is really something prevented your kid from sleeping, other than their stubbornness and love of your boob, relax and quit worrying.

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5. Tell people you don’t know  your kid sleeps great when they ask. Unless you are open to sleep advice, deny, deny, deny.  Seriously. People love to give sleep advice. And sometimes it is super helpful. And you learn a tip or trick that will get your kid to sleep 2.25 minutes longer than the night before. Sometimes you are like yes I have tried that and she still is dancing, even though I stopped blasting All About the Bass. And no I don’t think you are torturing your child by letting them cry, but I am weak and cave and did you see her poor teeth. The poor teeth I cannot let her cry.

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6. Finally, Repeat daily. Your parenting is not measured by the number of hours your child sleeps. You are not a failure because your child thinks naps are done in cars and Jimmy Fallon is a signal to turn off the lights. And most importantly, your child will not grow up to be the next Ted Bundy because he cannot soothe himself to sleep at x months old.

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{This post was brought to you by an episode of Blaze}